TGIF: Tina’s Glee-Inducing Fridays

Sista-Friend vs. Soul-Sista: On popcorn machines, taking over the world and calling your mother.

by Tina Francis | Twitter: @teenbug
____________________________________________________________

I don’t have a best friend.

I do, however, have a Sista-friend. A “sista-friend” is exactly what it sounds like. A friend who’s your sister.

“Only your real friends will tell you when your face is dirty.” ~Sicilian Proverb

A sista-friend keeps it real. This is the girl you want to go wedding dress shopping with. She’ll tell you the uncomfortable and often times, inconvenient truth when everyone else is sugar-coating the real issue. She’ll tell you that:
- Your gluteus maximus (bum or junk-in-the-trunk) looks fat in those jeans.
- Your bangs are too short, and
- You should call your mother to end the cold war.

She’s also the friend who morphs into a pitbull frothing at the mouth, if anyone dares to hurt you. She will instinctively grab a Costco-sized tub of French Vanilla ice cream and two spoons when you haven’t heard back from:
- The job interview,
- The boy you like, or
- Your mother.

My girlfriends Kavi, Liz, Wegene and my sister are definitely sista-friends. It’s a complex but rather beautiful relationship, where we can obsess about Spanx and human trafficking in the same conversation.

Popcorn Machine

I believe that there is a second category of sista-friends. A friend that is divinely placed in your path because your purpose is deeply tied to her purpose. You’re stakeholders in each others calling. She may live across the street, city or an ocean. Distance has no bearing on the relationship.

Here’s an easy way to spot her: When you’re around her your greatest ideas and dreams come bursting out like a overflowing popcorn machine. Zing, pop, blat! You can’t keep up. Ideas spewing out of every possible orifice of your body. You’re foaming at the mouth because there is something about being around this girl that helps you connect the dots, solve the crossword puzzle and annihilate that-darn-Rubik’s-cube that is life. Solutions bubble to the surface, things magically align themselves and patterns emerge when you’re around her.

And what’s even more amazing? You seem to have a similar effect on her.

This my friends, is my definition of a “Soul-Sista” (not to be confused with the Lady Marmalade definition.)

I’ve recently unearthed a “soul-sista” in my life. Those that read the blog often would instantly know who I’m talking about.

Idelette is a Soul-Sista.

She’s the Oprah to my Gayle, the Regis to my Kelly, the “EVOO” (extra-virgin olive oil) to my Rachel Ray. There’s something about being around her that helps me write a better story for my life. I see my potential instead of obsessing about my weaknesses. She gets me. I don’t have to waste my breath explaining what others may see as neurosis.

Given that she’s married and a mom of three, we rarely do the usual gf thing of going to the mall, grabbing sushi or sleeping over. When we see each other we brainstorm, conspire, analyze, critique, problem-solve and co-create.

She’s my catalyst.

She recharges my spirit.

She gives me a glimpse into the woman I was created to be.

Why you need a Soul-Sista…

We all can lose ourselves in the fog of life. Our journey can seem like an abstract accumulation of disjointed, garbled and scattered experiences that don’t add up to a coherent story.

Enter Stage Right your Soul-Sista.

Sometimes we need to see our story through the eyes of someone else. A Soul-Sista can help you find the common thread running through all your stories and you can do the same for her. We all need someone checking our blind-spots, tracking our journey and keeping us on course. What makes a Soul-sista different from a Sista-friend is that she is speaking your soul’s secret alien dialect.

This is the girl that will stay up late at night to help you draw out the maps, outline your strategy and plot out your plan to take over the world.

She is your co-pilot, advocate, lighthouse and ally.

She honours my story and I honour hers.

But oh! the blessing it is to have a friend to whom one can speak fearlessly on any subject; with whom one’s deepest as well as one’s most foolish thoughts come out simply and safely. Oh, the comfort – the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person – having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all right out, just as they are, chaff and grain together; certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and then with the breath of kindness blow the rest away.

~Dinah Craik, A Life for a Life, 1859

____________________________________________________________
Here are five things that brought a solid dose of glee to my week:

The First Grader + Finger Tutting + S’more Cookies + Spoken Word + Jack Vidgen = TGIF!

1.The First Grader: This heart-warming film is based on a true story about Kimani Maruge in Kenya, who at the age of 84 holds the Guinness World Record for being the oldest person to start primary school. Turns out the children in the film (the real stars) had never even seen a film or television set before! Their enthusiasm and energy translates beautifully on screen. Peeps in Vancouver, the movie is playing at Cineplex Odeon International Village Cinemas, 88 West Pender, Vancouver, BC – (604) 806-0799. Maybe we can organize a little group outing?

2. Finger Tutting: For the launch of Samsung’s flagship smartphone Galaxy SII in France they brought JayFunk, the internet Finger Tutting phenomenon, from Los Angeles to Paris. What’s “finger tutting?” you ask. Well Wikipedia says that: “Tutting” is a contemporary abstract interpretive “street dance” modeled after Egyptian hieroglyphics and derives it’s name from pharaoh Tutankhamun. Tutting uses fingers and arms to create geometrical shapes; such as boxes, hearts, etc.

The video gets really good at 0:39.

3. I found Julie Marie Craig’s lovely blog Always with Butter earlier this week. I discovered that while she lives in the SF Bay area now she actually attended Vancouver’s Emily Carr University for Art and Design. Small world!

In response to my email she said, “There is a bakery stand in the Public Market on Granville Island that sells Royal Empire Cookies. They are two shortbread cookies, with cherry jam and icing between them. Have you had them? If not, go get one the minute you are at the market next time! Lol. I’ve never seen them anywhere else and I’ve been craving them for the 2 years that I have been back in California.” Okay, how cute is she?! Also, I must hunt down these cookies!

Meanwhile enjoy the recipe for fabulous Graham Cracker S’mores Cookies. Who needs to go camping when you can chomp on these lovelies from the comfort of your own home?

4. Last week’s spoken word feature was accepted so warmly that I decided to post one of my all-time favourite pieces by Jonathan Paul Walton called “I’m Sorry, Anna Nicole.” Here at She Loves we like to honour the men who “get it right!” FYI: This is going to ROCK your world. Just sayin’.

He starts speaking at 1:15. Brace yourself. It’s good.

5. “Australia’s Got Talent” 14 year old contestant Jack Vidgen is causing quite the stir. This kid’s got serious pipes! They say he could be Australia’s Justin Beiber, but don’t hold that against him. Here he is singing an amazing rendition of Adele’s ‘Someone Like You’. It get’s good at 1:00.

____________________________________________________________

So … my delicious SheLoves ladies:
I think most of us are lucky enough to have a couple of close “Sista-friends” but:
- Can you tell the difference between Sista-Friends vs. Soul-Sistas?
- Do you have a Soul-Sista? How has she helped you?

Love you more than slow roasted BLT with a basil mayo spread,
xoxo,
Teen

To read more TGIFs from Tina: Click here.

(Image: Audrey Hepburn)
______________________________________________________

About: My name is Tina. Loved ones call me: Teen. I am drawn to all that is fresh, spontaneous and creative.

Confession: Some girls dream about Manolo Blahniks or their next Hermes bag. Not me. I dream of freshly baked bread, perfectly barbecued meat & steaming bowls of Pho. My dream lover *cue Mariah Carey song* is someone who would read out a menu to me in Barry White’s baritone voice. ha.ha. Everything about food makes my toes curl. The only thing that excites me more than eating food is beautiful pictures of food.

I was born and raised in Dubai and currently live in the beautiful city of Vancouver, known for some of the best sushi in the world.

I enjoy taking pictures.