Let Us Be Women Who Are Willing

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I leave for Moldova in two days and there’s a Yes on my heart.

“Where’s Moldova?”

A few weeks ago some friends were over for dinner and I was telling them about my upcoming adventure to Moldova. (I leave this Saturday to meet up with a Children’s HopeChest team of 10 women. We’ll spend a week with girls rescued out of human trafficking and learn about some of the economic initiatives to help create work in Moldova.)

I pulled out the large blue atlas, bought at a Rotary Booksale for $3 on a rainy Sunday in November when the girls were playing soccer and Shay had to go to the bathroom. There just also happened to be a giant booksale in the lobby by the bathroom. Voila! At the time I imagined the girls and I could cut up the pages and make jewelry or bookmarks, but on that Thursday night, I loved carrying the heavy book to the kitchen, remembering some geography skills and looking up “Moldova.”

“There!” My finger smashed down on the map.

I spotted the small country, sandwiched between Romania and the Ukraine.

There she is.

The poorest country in Europe.

Rampant human trafficking.

Invisible and unknown to too many.

Many people I talked to about my trip, hadn’t yet heard of Moldova. I hadn’t heard of it either until my mom-in-law gathered a group of women to Moldova when Shay (now five) was still in my pregnant belly. My heart ached to go along. I wanted to go with them, but it wasn’t my time to go then. I was meant to stay behind—be a sender—and pray for the women on that journey.

As I prayed, my heart for this small country grew.

I remember sitting in our big bed and typing out a letter: To the Women of Moldova. I remember the passion in my fingers. Tears spilling out … I wanted to will my heart for them—for a better life, a different economic position, less pain—through every key I hit on the computer.

Five years ago, here’s a few sentences of what I typed out: 

“I am thinking of you today, I am carrying you in my heart and I am praying you will rise up and make Moldova a proud nation. I know God is already holding you in the palm of His hand. You are His hope for this generation.

I bless you, my sisters, on the other side of the world. Perhaps I will get to meet some of you some day–I really hope so!”

_____________________

Right then, God was growing both my heart and my hunger to go.

From that time on, whenever I heard the mention of Moldova, my ears perked up.

I read Anne Jackson’s essay “The Sex Café” the moment it went live, reporting from her Children’s HopeChest trip to Moldova in 2010 with CEO Tom Davis and others.

That’s why my radar went off when Nicole Wick, an e-friend, wrote something in a facebook status this past summer. There were three key words (to me) in there: women + Moldova + trip.

Ding-ding-ding.

I left a comment. She sent me a DM on Twitter. And before I knew it, we were having a full conversation via Twitter Direct Messages.

January, she said.  A team of women.

The cost.

One week.

I started talking about it with Scott. Pragmatic as he is, he reminded me how we’d need to find a solution for our kids while I was away.

So, I jumped in and wrote a facebook status update, testing the waters. Perhaps someone felt utterly compelled to come look after our three kidlets for a week and that would be a big Divine Yes then, wouldn’t it?

Some of my busiest friends left  comments saying they would love to help out! But I had hoped for someone who might be willing to stay for the week.

I sent a message asking one friend if she might be interested.

I asked another friend, but she’d just started a brandnew job.

Nobody was biting.

Oops. Am I supposed to go, God?

I let it rest for a while.

Then I woke up with an early alarm one morning, wanting to hit the snooze button. I sensed a compelling to have quiet time, but I felt groggy and so tired. I still remember leaning against the bedroom wall, having a conversation with God over the snooze button. I was miliseconds away from crawling back into bed.

Then this: What if I wanted to talk to you about that?

I was playing dumb. About what?

Moldova.

Within 30 seconds I was downstairs in my green prayer chair, wide awake.

Like Samuel, my heart was so open to hearing : Speak, Lord, your servant is listening.

Almost immediately I saw a picture of a circle of women and God wanting to send someone to Moldova on a trip to go love on his girls there.

And the question: Whom shall I send?

I put up my hand immediately, like the eagerest beaver in God-class.

I stretched it up, way high. As high as humanly possible.

Send me, Lord, Send me, please! I want to go!

At first I honestly thought I would have to fight off the crowds who’d want to go on this adventure too.

Then I looked around the circle, into the nameless faces, and instinctively knew as I stopped my gaze on each face:

She can’t go.

She won’t go.

She can’t go.

She probably wouldn’t go.

My hand was still eager-beaver way up: Send me, Lord! I’d love to go!

The words resting on my chest and in my heart that morning were: 

“Now who do you think I want to send?”

As a mom, I would have liked to send the one who’d get the most benefit from going. The one who most needed it.

But I also know if that daughter won’t put up her hand–if she doesn’t get a glimpse of the goodness I am offering her–I can’t make her go. So, then I’ll pick the daughter who wants it.

I felt a smile. I sensed a lightness.

O, so this willingness is a good thing.

I had a glimpse that even though our God would love for more daughters to experience the joy of these thin places–where Heaven and Earth meet in the going and the trying—too few still are willing.

For too many of us, the book is closed and packed away before it’s even opened.

We won’t even consider the thought.

– The precious idea tucked away deep into your heart.

– The hope that feels more like wishful thinking.

– The possibility in the distance that makes your heart beat faster.

No room? No eyes to see possibility? No asking or seeking?

Then, sadly, also no heart-thumping, bridge-jumping, earth-roaring miraculous finding.

No Moldovas, no Bubanzas, no hard, sweaty half-marathons then. 

Too few God-glory stories to tell then.

No humming as we walk along then.

No writing on the earth with our lives then.

O, no!

Instead, my SheLovelies, on the eve of Moldova, what about this rather :

Let us be women with a yes on our hearts and a willingness to camp for a while where the seemingly impossible meets our ready feet.

Willing to stand at Impossible Peak and pray there until the mountains begin to move.

Willing to shake the dusty inertia off our feet and go to the ends of the earth.

Willing to lay down our own comfort and trust the God of all Comfort.

Willing to send and willing to pray until the dead bones come to life.

Let us plain and clear be women who are willing … 

___________________________

I’d so appreciate your thoughts and prayers as we go. 

– Jenni Clayville has all the pictures and details of our team here.

– Prudence Landis tells you what we’ll be up to while we’re there here.

– And some more of those details from Alise Wright here.

– And so important: Amanda Sims made a list of how you can pray for us here.

If you’d like to follow the whole kaboodle of us on Twitter, Jenni created a public list right here.

See you in Moldova!

__________________________

Image credit: Gorgeous Moldovan woman, by Veni Markovski

Brown background image by Shaire Productions

 

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Idelette McVicker
I like soggy cereal and I would like to go to every spot on the map of the earth to meet our world’s women. I dream of a world where no women or girls are for sale. I dream of a world where women and men are partners in doing the work that brings down a new Heaven on earth. My word last year was “roar” and I learned it’s not about my voice rising as much as it is about our collective voices rising in unison to bring down walls of injustice. This year, my own word is “soar.” I have three children and this place–right here, called shelovesmagazine.com–is my fourth baby. I am African, although my skin colour doesn’t tell you that story. I am also a little bit Chinese, because my heart lives there amongst the tall skyscrapers of Taipei and the mountains of Chiufen. Give me sweet chai and I think I’m in heaven. I live in Vancouver, Canada and I pledged my heart to Scott 11 years ago. I believe in kindness and calling out the song in each other’s hearts. I also believe that Love covers–my gaps, my mistakes and the distances between us. I blog at idelette.com and tweet @idelette.
Idelette McVicker

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Idelette McVicker
  • Erin Wilson

    Your yes is beautiful. Oh, that we would each fill the earth with them.
    Praying for you in your going and your coming back.

    • Thank you, friend. Ooooo, I like that: “that we would each fill the earth with them.” I appreciate you so much.

  • Praying for you, Idelette and your team! You will be doing such important work! Praying for God to prepare these young girls hearts for the love and skills you are all about to show them! And praying too for the courage to say yes to whatever story God has for me! blessings for your journey!

    • Thank you so much! I really appreciate it! xoxo

  • Oh man-Oh man … your willingness is infectious. I feel like the girl who is being asked to stay back and “send” others in this season, even though my eager bear hand is waving maniacally in the air!

    I’m definitely going to camp on these two things:

    – Let us be women with a yes on our hearts and a willingness to camp for a while where the seemingly impossible meets our ready feet.

    – Willing to send and willing to pray until the dead bones come to life.

    Can’t wait to “send” you in person tonight! Can’t wait to hear Moldova stories when you are back!

    Love your eager-beaver keen heart so much, #eeeeek
    Teen

    • I love that we’re the girls who manically wave our hands in the air–ready and willing for the next adventure. I love that you’re an eager beaver heart too. #notalone #YAYYYYY!

  • Also, I’m a little jellies.

  • I gained a Russian soul when I learned the language and lived there, and have studied Eastern Europe and human trafficking for years. I will be definitely praying for you all! This is so on my heart <3

    • Thank you so much, Danielle! I didn’t know about your Russian experience. That’s so great. Perfect for the work you are now engaged in. I’d appreciate your prayers–in English or Russian!

  • Also! Beautiful writing. Bravo.

  • PrudyChick

    I love this. Oh how I love this. Meet you soon friend. <3

  • JenniClayville

    SO excited! This trip is going to break our hearts and change all our lives for the better. I’m so humbled to be going with you!

  • BrennaDA

    “Let us be women with a yes on our hearts and a willingness to camp for a while where the seemingly impossible meets our ready feet.”

    This is Moldova. And this is amazing seeing God work in you for years and how your passion, His faithfulness, and a heart that you share with Him will change lives for now in in generations to come.

    This is all of us. With our dreams and our hopes that are drowned out by fear. Right before I opened the tab to read this I was thinking about the BIG things I wanted to do, and how it felt like I was missing them, or they were missing me. I now feel like standing in front of that mountain until it moves.

    Thank you, Strong One. My prayers will be with you all!

  • cjdeboer

    I’m a little jellies too! But I’m sending you friend, with so much love and expectancy because I know you are the right woman at the right time – all of you are. I hope you can document/share as much of this journey as possible so we can all learn, grow and put Moldova on our hearts. xo

  • I am so excited for you taking this trip! (although I wish it included a stopover in Amsterdam ;)!) I will be praying for your team and can’t wait to follow along with your updates.

  • Lindsay

    “O, this willingness is a good thing,” Such a timely post for me today…funny how God works. Prayers with you and your team as you head out…may God do great things. Thank you for this.

  • Love being in the company of the willing!!! Yes to Bubanza, Gulu, Soweto, marathons and Moldova! Yes to identity cards, wells, panties and dancing together. Yes to all of it, yes to more of it. And, as Erin said, may the chorus of yes, sung by the willing, fill the earth!

    Love you!

  • AbbyKNorman

    At 15 years old I heard God and answered what the Lord had placed in my heart , here I am send me. I never bothered to look up the verse. I am churched enough to know that was in the Bible somewhere. I was asking God to get me out of a situation I didn’t want to be in anymore and woke up with Isiah 6:8 in my heart. Here I am. Send me. When it is glorious and adventurous and hard, when it is waiting and sending and praying and I am a teeny bit jealous. When it kind of sucks a whole lot. When it is glorious. When I see the results, when I don’t. Send me. Here I am. Amen to your heart, amen to your willingness. I will join the chorus who have been sent to pray for your team. Here I am. Send me. Amen.

  • Praying for you sweet friend!!!! Can’t wait to hear all that you learn.

    “Let us be women with a yes on our hearts and a willingness to camp for a while where the seemingly impossible meets our ready feet.” Yep. Completely. I get this. The impossible stands before me….with Uganda, with She’s Worth It Campaign, with the promises He has laid on my heart….and yet – I will say “yes!”

    I remember telling a friend just a few weeks ago that I can’t BELIEVE God would pick me to get to do these amazing things – she quietly reminded me that a lot of people don’t WANT to do the things I am called to 🙂 I loved your illustration of you with your happy hand up wanting to be chosen, while no one else’s hands were even raised 🙂

    May we stay in a constant state of awe that our God is allowing us to be a part of His work! Love it. Love YOU!

    B

  • Jane

    Wishing you a safe trip and may the angels be with you all wherever you go.

  • Oh golly gosh! I am ready to go! But clearly God doesn’t agree, He has told me to wait, so whilst I wait I will be the girl who sends: I’m praying.

  • Jen

    I love your description of how God spoke to you in the morning when you almost hit the alarm. I feel Him speak to me in very similar ways, but I hadn’t heard anyone else describe it before. You have validated the messages I have received!! Thank you for that!! I look forward to hearing more about your adventures in Moldova. God bless!!

  • Praying for you all! Excited to see all that happens.

  • Marinda van niekerk

    So proud of you! May the love of Africa be the beams you ride on! Love. Marinda

  • Stacy

    The “Took” side of us is the Holy Spirit-at-work in us, nudging us hobbits out of our cozy holes and on to Adventure. (I’m reading the Hobbit!) Love and prayers and journey mercies.

  • Pingback: Let Us Be Women Who Are Willing « Giraffes are tall and Ladybugs are small.()

  • fiona lynne

    “Let us be women with a yes on our hearts and a willingness to camp for a while where the seemingly impossible meets our ready feet.”

    So good to read this today. Imagining you in Moldova now and know God is blessing your willingness. I pray for that same willingness in my life.