Thinking of the Next Big Thing

I spent 15 years of my life dancing. Everyone gasps at the show-stopper steps, but I’ll tell you a secret: the bedrock of ballet is the “transition” steps: the rather quotidian, easy movements that three-year-olds learn their very first class. A pile is a straight-up knee-bend. First position places your heels together, toes turned out, like a dove’s […]

The Tender Necessity of Taking Care of Myself

It’s never good when your kindergartner sees blood dribbling down your chin. It started with the oral surgery. Receding gums meant a graft of tissue from the roof of my mouth to the overexposed teeth. I was expecting the surgery to be uncomfortable, expected my gums to be sore. What I did not expect was […]

When I Hate Greeting People on Sundays

This is going to make me sound like a misanthrope, but I hate greeting people on Sundays. At my church’s weekly service, a pastor gives the announcements, dismisses the children for Sunday school, and then cheerfully announces that we should greet the people around us in the pews. On the worst days, they give us […]

The Hidden Blessing of Feeling Horrible

You would think that when you feel horrified, ashamed, and terrified, you would know you are feeling horrified, ashamed, and terrified. But in my experience, that’s not a given. Take one twilight, about two years ago. Someone that knows my family well invited me to a Facebook group along with some other people I trust. […]

Jazz Hands and All the Ways I Feel Powerful

Last summer, I went to a reunion of sorts. We gathered in the glistening kitchen of someone I’ve known since high school, drinking margaritas. I met all of the people there decades ago at my church, though we don’t all see each other as often any more. Still, we know each other’s histories. I asked […]