Love in a Box

By Idelette McVicker

How much Love could you fit into a little red box? If the girls behind the SheLoves initiative could have their way, it would be a whole lot.

It started at LifeWomen conference 2009 when Helen Burns looked at the cute lunch boxes and thought: I’m sure we could do something more with these! She then asked the girls at conference to bring their lunch boxes back and add a $5 donation. After the three-day event, the boxes were filled with toiletries and necessities and distributed around the city.

“Our theme was Love and it just worked,” says Helen Burns, pastor at Relate Church and the visionary behind the SheLoves initiative. “It was an easy way to give back.”

That first year SheLoves filled 750 boxes. Now the Love keeps spreading. These little red boxes have been distributed to people living in low-income housing in Vancouver, the Cyrus Center in Abbottsford, Vancouver Children’s Hospital, the elderly, homeless, women in transition and even women leaving prostitution in Nairobi, Kenya.

“When we handed it out to a some residents in a low-income housing building, the were so shocked, they kept handing it back,” remembers Loretta Hibbs, community pastor at Relate Church. “They couldn’t believe there was no cost to the gift they’d received.”

SheLoves also dropped off 60 boxes to the Cyrus Center in Abbottsford, a place where homeless teenagers find refuge. “Now when the teenagers get dropped off to spend the night, they find a red box on their bed. Their faces light up,” says Hibbs.

“It brings value and dignity to people and show we care,” explains Loretta Hibbs. “We want the invisible to feel visible. We want to show them: We see you. You’re not invisible. God loves you and we do too.”

Check out this article in the Abbotsford Times about the Cyrus Center and the impact of one of these little red boxes in the life of a teenager.

The House that Mercy & Love Built

Grand Dedication: Milestone for the First Canadian Mercy Home

By Sarah Bessey

It was a true “M” day for Mercy Ministries of Canada: “M” for milestones,
memories made, miracle moments and mud! Even the rain and cold couldn’t
damper the spirits of those that gathered at the Grand Dedication ceremony
of the first Canadian Mercy Ministries home on Saturday, May 29, 2010.

The supporters and advocates joined together to dedicate the home to the
glory of God and pray for hope to be restored and lives transformed in
Canada. The keynote speaker was Mercy Ministries Founder and President,
Nancy Alcorn. The event featured community leaders, delicious food, music,
tours of the new home, self-guided prayer walks and an official Dedication
and Ribbon Cutting ceremony.

“It’s been seven years of prayer, hard work and dedication by the entire
Mercy family,” said Nicola Bartel, Executive Director of Mercy Ministries
Canada. “And we could not be happier that this day is here.  Our hearts are
overwhelmed with gratitude and expectancy for the lives that will be
transformed and the hope that will be restored.”

The journey to establish Mercy Ministries in Canada has been well-worth it,
according to Nancy Alcorn. “Good things take time, but great things take
more time–that seems to sum up the journey for Mercy to be established in
the nation of Canada,” she said.  The desire to choose best over good
culminated in a major time of thanksgiving and celebration.

“We’re thankful for the vast Mercy family that are faithful and passionate
about women, a voice of life, telling them that for their former shame they
shall have double honour,” said Helen Burns, pastor of Relate Church and
member of the Mercy Ministries of Canada Board. “On behalf of the young
women of Canada as well as their families, we thank the individuals,
churches, businesses, ministries and organizations that have given so much
of their time, energy, prayers and resources.”

The event raised over $20,000 for the ministry.

Mercy Ministries of Canada is a free-of-charge, non-profit residential home
for young women that face life-controlling issues such as drug and alcohol
addiction, depression, eating disorders, unplanned pregnancy, physical and
sexual abuse and self-harm.  Their Christ-centred approach to healing allows
young women to permanently stop destructive cycles and prepares them to take hope out into their communities.

The home, located in South Surrey, will begin to welcome their first residents in August.

What Soccer Can Do

The FIFA World Cup 2010 brought new hope for a united story in South Africa.

By Marinda van Niekerk

Many people were scared and uncertain about the feasibility of an African country to successfully present the Soccer World Cup 2010. Perhaps the most apprehensive were South Africans themselves. As a nation we weren’t really sure if we could pull it off. We doubted our ability to rise above our history of pain and intense hurt. Many white South Africans had very little trust in the country’s ability to pull this huge challenge off successfully.

If you now listen to conversations, many Black, Colored and Indian South Africans had the same doubts, maybe for different reasons: from lack of self-confidence to doubt in our ability to rise above the history of corruption, division and political turmoil.

And wow, were we all caught by surprise!

Surprize!

We surprised ourselves by getting it right. People came together as never before in our history. Crowds poured into the streets with a common goal, a common dream, a common passion. People, previously distant from one another, came close enough to understand the passion of the other. We shared something new and extraordinary. The will to succeed and the calling from one heart to another to make magic, drew us together. Believe it or not, it happened. The unexpected happened, the unpredictable, the unimaginable … South Africa rose from a place of distrusting and not knowing each other, to sharing in the one thing that creates magic: Hope.

In 1994 a nation was drafted on paper and voted into being. But, to me, the real nation was born in 2010. We’ll try our best to hold on to the hope. We are committing ourselves to work hard and not take this magic for granted. It is going to ask of us to realistically look at our surroundings: the reality of horrid living conditions for many, poverty, a breakdown in health services, a lacking education system, joblessness, housing crises and corrupt leaders. These are all huge challenges, but we are looking at the challenges with new glasses. Glasses tinted with the coat of hope.

A new storyline was started: the story of a nation that can succeed at what we set out to achieve. People are connecting and sharing life experiences. People are literally and figuratively walking on new roads not traveled on before. People are seeing one another in a new light, as one nation and with a shared story.

We are excited to learn a new song and sing it together. Maybe at the next Soccer Word Cup in 2014, we will have shared songs to sing, and not only vuvuzelas to blow! May our stories inspire the world to treasure humanity and celebrate diversity. May South Africa never again go to wars, but share in meals together. God bless Africa.

About Marinda:

Marinda serves as CEO of PEN, an NGO based in South Africa serving the diverse community of people who live on the streets or apartments (flats) in Pretoria. Our purpose at PEN is to “Ignite Change, Heal Communities and Nurture Togetherness.” Marinda has been married for 19 years and she’s the mother of twin girls (7) and a busy boy (4) I  love sailing, art, camping and I’m a Twitter fanatic. You can follow her @MarindS

Sexuality and the Feminine Heart

What does God say about our Sexuality? Let’s talk about when two become one.

By Helen Burns, Photo credit: Tina Francis

Right in the beginning of the Bible we find a perfect picture of God’s original design and purpose of our sexuality. It’s there so boldly and yet with such tender innocence and beauty in Genesis 2 verses 24 and 25: “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh. The man and his wife were both naked, and they felt no shame.”

Where there is no sin, there is no shame.

Sadly, to most women the notion of sex and “no shame” don’t go together. We live in a world so fundamentally broken, deceived and disillusioned when it comes to the subject of our sexuality. If we were to be educated by popular TV episodes, read the latest women’s magazines or listen in to most conversations regarding a woman and her sexuality, it would likely be so far from the intent and purpose of the very Designer of our sexuality, because everything He made is good.

It is clear to me that when you don’t understand the purpose behind why something is created, it will be abused.

The Wonder of Sex

It’s imperative that we as women give a true and accurate expression to the wonder of sex in all of its glory. One friend recently shared with me how her mother had taught her about sex between a husband and a wife. She had told her: “It’s a little bit of Heaven on earth.” I love that! If all of our daughters, granddaughters, sisters, mothers and friends had Heaven’s perspective we would quickly begin to take back the territory that the enemy has stolen from this area of our lives.

In marriage, where it is designed to be experienced in its perfect and sacred context, sex becomes a place of safety and strength. It holds a husband and a wife together. Sex is like the glue in a marriage that binds us together physically, emotionally and spiritually. The bonding agent of sex is so powerful that outside of its purpose and rightful context it becomes a source of bondage.  It will strip away from our hearts the ability to trust and connect they way God intended for us to trust in complete abandonment.

In
1 Corinthians 6:16-20 in The Message it says: “There’s more to sex than mere skin on skin. Sex is as much spiritual mystery as physical fact. As written in Scripture, ‘The two become one.’ Since we want to become spiritually one with the Master, we must not pursue the kind of sex that avoids commitment and intimacy, leaving us more lonely than ever—the kind of sex that can never ‘become one.’ There is a sense in which sexual sins are different from all others.  In sexual sin we violate the sacredness of our own bodies, these bodies that were made for God-given and God-modeled love, for ‘becoming one’ with another. Or didn’t you realize that your body is a sacred place, the place of the Holy Spirit? Don’t you see that you can’t live however you please, squandering what God paid such a high price for? The physical part of you is not some piece of property belonging to the spiritual part of you. God owns the whole works. So let people see God in and through your body. So this is clear evidence that sex is always more than just sex … we are incapable of engaging in something with our bodies and not have it affect our hearts and soul as well.”

A marriage is intended to be a story of love, sacrifice, devotion and awe. There is a supernatural mystery that happens in a relationship and, in particular, the sexual relationship.

Related Stories:
Five Requirements for a Great Sex Life

About Helen:
Helen Burns and her husband John speak around the world on the topic of relationships. They host the TV show called “Relate with John and Helen.”

Caring for our Community: Visiting a Local Seniors Home

By Daniela Schwartz, Photo credit: Tina Francis

What happens when women with open hearts, armloads of kids and fresh cookies ascend upon a local seniors’ home.

A week before a group of us were to visit a seniors home in our local community, I toured the facility. It was very quiet as residents had their lunch and chatted softly amongst themselves. Then I grew concerned: I realized visiting with close to 10 toddlers and babies, this home would not remain quiet for long. I voiced my concern but our tour guide, the recreation coordinator, assured me it was fine. She was so excited to have us.

The next week, armed with cookies and kids, we assembled for our first Thursday morning visit to the Seniors Home with expectant hearts. There were about 20 residents waiting for us.  I am sure they heard us coming.

The kids served cookies, played games, chatted with seniors and read books with them. I had brought my two-year-old nephew along since my son is in school already. My nephew followed me around as I served cookies and helped by lovingly licking the icing off the Timbits and then handing them to the residents. (I’m sure they appreciated the gesture, but I did get them their own unlicked Timbits.)

Near the end of our hour a couple of our talented girls got up to sing some hymns, like Amazing Grace and How Great Thou Art. Our seniors perked right up—even the fellow who had been sleeping in his wheelchair the entire time. Quite a few joined in too, singing softly. It was beautiful.

Putting this together was so simple and made a difference. I learned that it’s easy to come up with a million reason why we can’t do it. But I saw that when God puts something on your heart and you say yes, that yes can change our world. It definitely brightened the world of a few seniors on a Thursday morning and it enlarged the world of every one of us who visited.

I Am Sisterhood

By Idelette McVicker, Photo credit: Tina Francis

God is up to something with women on the earth. And it sounds like Sisterhood.

“I am woman, hear me roar.” These words from the song by Australian Helen Reddy was the first song penned by an Australian to ever reach No. 1 on the US Billboard charts. It became an anthem—a kind of battlecry—for the women’s rights movement in the 1970s.

Now, decades later, a new sound is coming out of Australia, this time led by Bobbie Houston, senior pastor at Hillsong Church. It’s a movement that calls for a Sisterhood of Jesus followers, united in love and action to help bring solution on the earth. The anthem? I am Sisterhood.

“There are orphans and children to rescue, sisters to come alongside and nations to believe in,” says Houston. She’s about gathering a sisterhood on the earth that understands their responsibility to serve “the least.”

A Global Movement

In March 2010, over 14,000 women gathered in Sydney, Australia for one of several global Colour conferences. Houston also hosts Colour conferences in London and Kiev. Women from every denomination and many corners of the earth gather to be inspired and challenged.

“(I am Sisterhood is) a declaration that positions itself amid awareness and responsibility, concern and care, injustice and solution,” says Houston. (It’s) a declaration ultimately concerned with the welfare of the world and her inhabitants.”

The sound of this Sisterhood is in tune with movements like the one spawned out of New York Times bestselling authors Nicholas Kristoff and Cheryl WuDunn’s book “Half the Sky” that says when you empower women and girls, you empower a community and even a nation. Along the same lines, the viral phenomenon The Girl Effect proposes that 3.3 billion women and girls on the planet are part of the solution.

She has the power to change her world

One key phrase from three days at Colour conference in Sydney still stands out: “She has the power to change her world. We have the power to help her.” It’s about those of us who have power and resource realizing our responsibility to come alongside those who don’t.

This Sisterhood is a movement across denominational and cultural boundaries intent on inspiring ordinary women across the globe to rise up into the gaps on the earth: to help bring solution to poverty, orphans, widowhood, human trafficking, abuse, isolation and disease. Whatever the cause God places on the hearts of women, Houston and her Colour Sisterhood team inspires participants to move into it and be the change.

“The earth is suffering; we need to step in,” agrees Darlene Zschech, worship leader at Hillsong Church and spokesperson for Compassion Australia.

Waking Up to the Things that Break God’s Heart

“We were born to be the light of the world. We were born to dispel darkness,” said Christine Caine, founder of the A21 Campaign that fights sex trafficking. “The last reformation was one of creeds. The next one will be one of deeds.” Her plea was urgent: “Don’t sleep through the alarm clock.” She quoted Romans 13:12 from The Message: ‘Be up and awake to what God is doing.’ … Really, we are waking up to the things that break God’s heart.”

Are you awake? Join the sisterhood.

About Idelette:

Idelette McVicker is founding editor of shelovesmagazine.com and loves the sisterhood of women she gets to do life with. Her passion is tracking the status and stories of women on the earth. You can read more of her writing at www.idelette.com or follow her tweets at @idelette.

Mercy Saved Me

An honest, raw account of one girl’s struggle to find Love. When there was nowhere else to turn, she met Mercy.

By Mary*

He pulled up his pants and answered his buzzing cell phone: “Hi honey, I’m just about to leave the office and will meet you at Jeff’s BBQ in 20 minutes … Love you too!”

He was my third client that night. You’d think I was used to it, but he was different. He didn’t enter the room with a fear of being discovered. He entered the room with an expectation: he had just paid $250 for 45 minutes of “full service.”

I had been able to get away with “partial service” with the previous two men that night, but he knew exactly what he wanted and—as he reminded me when I said no and pleaded with him to stop: he had paid.

Dreading the next four hours and still five clients to go on my shift, I fearfully sat on the floor, not knowing what to do.

Living in the Shadow of Death

I somehow made it through that night, driving home while grabbing at any excuse viable for escape. The sad part was that getting home was no better; life felt like a bubble of hell. A few hours later, after having purged for the 17th time that day, I questioned if anything could ever change. Between the excessive cutting, depression, and eating disorder, I was in shock that functioning was still an option. It was sad to think that my childhood had been so promising, yet my current years were lived in the shadow of death.

Nothing in particular got me to where I was. A combination of lies, stereotypical pressures, perfectionism, traumatic experiences, fear of rejection and an addictive personality constantly toiled to sit on the throne of my heart. It was exhausting.

Suicide was a normal daydream in my season of despair, but one particular attempt is important to note. Four hours after ingesting 120 Extra-Strength Tylenol tablets, I was rushed to the hospital. My first night there is a blur. I was nauseated from a combination of IV fluids, charcoal and the overwhelmingly strong smell of sanitizer. The blood pressure monitor was constantly alerting the nurses that my organs were, once again, trying to shut down. I felt as though my body was trying to kill me, which was probably correct as only hours before I had attempted to murder it.

Begging for Mercy

It was during this specific hospitalization that I experienced the power of a living God. Jesus had always been the guy I read about in my Bible, but on that night everything changed. Staring at the ceiling in my isolated room, I began to cry out. I felt as though I was in an intense wrestling match with someone much stronger than me and, although I tried my hardest, I was quickly accepting the reality of near defeat. In the last second, words bubbled up from within: “Mercy!” I begged.

I clung to that word for two more years while I fought with the idea of committing to residential treatment. It wasn’t until a final, miraculously failed suicide attempt led me straight into the application process, that I accepted Mercy Ministries as my ray of hope. Six whirlwind months later, on August 14, 2007, I walked through the doors of Mercy Ministries in St. Louis.

Fact vs Truth

I’d been in church for a number of years, so the Word was not a new concept; however, being in an environment that encouraged me to listen and apply Truth was. I still thought I needed to bargain with God for freedom, but it wasn’t until three months into the program that my eyes were opened. I learned the concept of fact vs Truth. Fact was that I came from a place of devastation and was deemed unsalvageable; Truth said something else. God whispered to my heart about the day He dreamed me into existence. He spoke about how He purposefully knit me together and wrote all of my days in His book, including the ugly ones.

During that conversation, Scripture dropped from my head into my heart. I can remember smiling as I understood why Mercy Ministries is called Mercy Ministries. It was in God’s power to punish me for the things of my past, but He chose to bring me to a place of tangible love instead. Believing that God maybe had a plan of freedom for my life, I dove into the program and began to see the words from my Bible come alive. I no longer feared the future, but was excited about the God dreams in my heart. Instead of dreading meal times, I got excited that I loved my body enough to feed it and chose not to purge—even when I had dessert.

Instead of lusting after obliteration, I hungered to be in His presence. Each new day was an adventure of learning about who my Father had created me to be.

Excited to Live

God used Mercy Ministries to save my life. Those six months of spiritual boot camp not only brought healing and freedom, but prepared me for my destiny. I graduated excited to live, while humbled to be alive.

Since graduating over two years ago I have had the opportunity to experience freedom that I only ever considered in my dreams. Trials and temptations still come, but I know that I have the greater One in me. I am so grateful that I learned the importance of renewing my mind, recognizing lies, and allowing the Holy Spirit to be my guide.

Before attending Mercy I was the client professionals dreaded working with—

a bundle of destructional chaos. Today I am the professional who welcomes bundles of destructional chaos, knowing that freedom is accessible for all who seek Him.

*Mary might not be her real name, but her story is as real as it gets.

About Mary:

Mary is currently completing her Bachelor of Social Work specializing in Mental Health. She is a Youth Worker and Crisis Line Volunteer who is passionate about social justice and anything made with espresso.

About Mercy Ministries:

Mercy Ministries of Canada will open its beautiful doors in May 2010 to several applicants who come from many different stories. Mercy Ministries of Canada provides hope and healing to desperate young women who are seeking freedom from life-controlling issues such as drug and alcohol addiction, depression, eating disorders, unplanned pregnancy, physical and sexual abuse and self-harm. To learn more about Mercy Ministries of Canada, check out their website here.

Third Culture Kid Grows Up & Comes Home

By Wegene Menouta | Photo credit: Tina Francis

When you grow up living in many corners of the world, it gets harder to call anywhere home.

 

For the longest time, I struggled with the question: “Where is home?” It wasn’t that I didn’t have a house to live in, because I had more than just a roof over my head. I had loving parents who always encouraged me and my sister in everything we set out to do.

As a child, you rarely think about concepts like citizenship and identity, especially when you are loved and provided for. It was only when I entered my teens and was repeatedly asked the question that it truly dawned on me how I couldn’t simply answer without numerous or convoluted explanations.

Unlike my contemporaries, my story is one of living in various corners of the world. My Ethiopian parents left their homeland to join the United Nations, and ended up living and working in Southeast Asia and then various countries in Southern Africa.

I was born and raised in Southern Africa, and have only visited Ethiopia twice in my life. Although an Ethiopian by birth, I often thought of myself as a “global kid,” having spent most of my formative years adapting to new communities and cultures resulting from our constant moves. Until I moved to Canada in 1993 to attend high school, I was truly a global nomad.  I made friends easily but was wary of making deep bonds knowing another move was inevitable.

Third Culture Kid

In Canada, I was introduced to the idea of “third culture kid. ” Coined by  Ruth Hill Useem, it refers to an individual ” who has spent a significant part of their developmental years outside their parents’ culture, building relationships to all of the cultures they are exposed to, while not having full ownership of any-, assimilating elements into their life experience.”  At last I found a title for what I am, and more importantly, recognized there were others like me.

This process of identity took an interesting path. I recall my first day in high school in Surrey, BC. When my classmates asked where I was born, I replied “Swaziland.” They, however, heard or perceived “Switzerland.” My insistence that it was Swaziland, was met with puzzled looks and some polite nods as they had assumed I wanted to say Switzerland.  Realizing their misunderstanding, I explained that it was in fact Swaziland, a small country in Southern Africa!

How’s your pet lion?

Shortly after that, I was bombarded with questions of what it was like to live in Africa. Did we live in huts? Did we drive cars? Did we have pet elephants and lions? How come I spoke English so well? Thinking immediately they would laugh it off, I responded enthusiastically, “Yes, definitely, and I really missed my pet Lion, Simba.” When they willingly believed me, I was shocked and embarrassed. I soon discovered that their knowledge of Africa was limited to what little they saw on TV and news broadcasts.  I also realized how blessed I was to have traveled so much, and to have seen so many different places in the world. I made it my mission to make people aware of the rich culture and the beauty of Africa.

Although I faced minor comedic situations at school largely due to cultural differences in vocabulary, for example using the term “rubber” to a male classmate in place of “eraser,” “trolley” instead of “cart,” “boot” instead of “trunk”, etc. I quickly adapted to the Canadian way of life. Surrounded by people of diverse backgrounds, I began to feel settled for the first time in my life. I finished high school and continued on to university in BC. After many years of living in “the Best Place on Earth,” I found myself realizing that Canada could be “home.” However, it wasn’t until I took the oath of citizenship in January 2010 to become a naturalized Canadian that I truly felt that Canada is home and I am a Canadian.