Motherhood Un-Wisdom

My stomach precedes me as I navigate between cramped tables and chairs. I wave to aunts I haven’t seen since the last family wedding and cousins who look impossibly grown up. It couldn’t have been that long ago we were skating in woolen slippers around Oma’s kitchen floor, devouring pans of her impossibly good Rice […]

The Sacrament of Childbirth

I was shocked by how similar childbirth was to watching my father-in-law die. There is the pacing, the patience, the impatience, the watching for signs of death—or life. The living room transforms into a tunnel where the outside world is fuzzy and out of focus and inside, all senses are heightened. As the time for […]

Pregnant with Heaven

When I was a child and teenager, preparing for and expecting Jesus’ imminent return was a popular topic in the Christian circles I was in. I understood that I was supposed to eagerly anticipate it, because that was the right thing, but the precursor to Jesus’ return sounded quite terrifying. I saw films imagining torture […]

Chapped Lip Prayers Over Baby Onesies

I yank open the drawer in my bedside table, on a mission for lip balm. But the search is halted before I can start rummaging, when my eyes land on a tiny, white onesie. It’s carefully folded atop the random receipts, bobby pins and candy wrappers. There’s a grinning clock on the front, and tags […]