Launching Global Mothers: Finding My Purpose in Another’s Dream

” … what began as an invitation to orchestrate my dad’s dream, has turned into an opportunity to shape my own.”

By Katie Mogan Graham

I spent the first twenty odd years of my life thinking I was meant to be an artist. It didn’t really matter what kind, just someone who spent her days making things beautiful (and being allowed to make her living quarters messy as she did so). I loved to draw and design costumes as a child. This was followed by a brief love affair with pottery and then a longer relationship with photography in high school. At university I decided to major in Art History (aka studying other people who made the world beautiful) and I worked at a gallery until I graduated.

The heady, idealistic phase of believing my papers actually made an impact on the world around me, ended abruptly as I entered “the workforce.” Braced with my best imitation of an “office outfit,” I spent three years trying to add beauty to my cubicle-d surroundings (and sometimes their inhabitants). I organized events, decorated lunchrooms, styled photo shoots, made elaborate presents for my colleagues’ birthdays, but still felt that my nine-to-five beautification project fell short of what I could really do, if given the opportunity. Convinced that I could do more, I ended up leaving my steady salary to start my own business dedicated solely to my love of fashion, events and beauty.

I called myself “the urban stylist” and spent my days cruising stores on Robson Street in Vancouver for the latest trends. I spent nights attending fashion shows. I enjoyed the freedom to plan my days however I liked, and particularly loved writing for local fashion publications. Still, as the months progressed, I sensed something wasn’t quite right. It could be that I had recently met a really nice plaid-wearing guy from a small town “Up North,” or maybe the massive pile of credit card bills were finally starting to take their toll. There are probably many reasons why this latest incarnation of my artistic dream didn’t work out, but the deciding factor was being asked to help someone else live theirs.

A Dream

In 2010, my dad asked me to help him a launch an organization that had been his dream for over twenty years. He had the vision and the means to support it, but he wanted someone with an arts background to get it off the ground. The idea was to create market access for impoverished artisans around the world. We would partner with development organizations to ensure wages were fair and profits were split between the artisans and community development projects. In addition to increased demand for their products, we would also provide the artisans with design ideas to appeal to North American consumers. I would be in charge of designing and choosing the products and creating our brand, an artistic challenge too enticing to turn down.

In the last two years, what began as an invitation to orchestrate my dad’s dream, has turned into an opportunity to shape my own. It’s not what I ever would have envisioned for my life, and yet it satisfies my desire to create and find beauty. I don’t make things, but I help people make them, and somehow that is much more satisfying. The women may not step off the pages of Vogue, but they are far more beautiful than any model I have met.

So yes, I could do more–support more charities, volunteer for more events, tithe more, give more time. I could also spend less on lattes, watch fewer reruns on Netflix, gossip less, whine less. I could do these things, but I’ve decided that my purpose, what I was truly made to do is to take what I love and use it to connect with others. I can’t delete my past, so I intend to let it continue shaping my future.

 Launch

Tomorrow, Saturday May 12th, we (Global Mothers) are celebrating the last two years of research and preparation by throwing a big party!

The timing is actually quite perfect as it is both Mother’s Day weekend and World Fair Trade Day–basically our organization in a nutshell. We are inviting everyone to come and join us as we share information about our artisans, their products and the work that the NGOs are doing in their communities. There will be live music, interactive drum workshops, songs and stories for kids provided by Vancouver mom/songwriter Sheree Plett, a whole kids zone with face painting, crafts and a photo booth, as well as multiple screenings of our short film, “Buy Good”. Everyone who attends can enter our draw to win Global Mothers products, as well as munch on delicious food prepared by the amazing ladies who run The Banqueting Table. We’d love to share Global Mothers Day with you, so drop by on Saturday, May 12th anytime from 12pm-4pm. Regent College: 5800 University Blvd. on the UBC Campus. You can check out our facebook page here or download our GM launch event poster here.

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About Katie:

I am that person who stays up late on Tuesday nights, watching kitten videos on Youtube. I am also the person who routinely eats milk duds and grape juice for dinner while watching said videos–information I don’t typically share with anyone. I am the happy newly wed wife of one lovely Northern BC fellow, who loves me despite my “endearing” quirks. When I am not tearing-up at the sight of kittens yawning in their sleep, I manage a non-profit, called Global Mothers. It takes me places I never thought I would go, introduces me to women I am honoured to have met, and challenges me to be more of who I was made to be.

Soul Sunday: On Kids, Dreams and Empty Fields

Memories of summer, driving down the Oregon coast + kids dreaming of rollerblades + watching a farmer plough, but never plant. 

By Kisa MacDonald | Twitter: @kisamac

Everyone recognized us in our old van.  The seats were plaid: yellow, orange and green.  The hard top roof was over ten feet tall. Daydreams and old radio tunes would rise over the grumbling engine. My entire school could see us coming.

Every mid-summer, we would travel south and watch sunrises over the sand dunes. We’d sink into the back seat of that old van, watching the Oregon coast unfold: Astoria, Cannon, Tillamook, Newport, Eugene … to visit some old friends in a little town called Sweet Home, Oregon.

We saw real poverty.  On those summer days in Sweet Home, the kids played–as kids always do–with no shoes, but in unpaved streets and unsafe homes. Recognizing hunger, we filled up our old van with groceries, and went door-to-door, giving it all away.

Mom taught us in simple ways how to recognize and value the dreams of others. She used to take each child aside and ask: “If you could do anything in one day, what would it be?”  The kids’ answers were always pretty simple: rollerskating, a new dress, a trip to the beach, a long bike ride, etc.  So, we all piled into the van and took them rollerskating, bought new dresses and went to the beach. We did everything we could.

The Farmer

Mom told me this story, once. When she was completing her undergrad degree, she would sit and watch a farmer who lived across the road. He regularly tilled the soil, turning back and forth across his field.  But, he never planted anything.

The farmer’s field is now a new park in suburban Victoria. No crops were ever planted. No playgrounds have been built.  Forty years have passed and it still sits empty. We laugh together at the paradox. Like, really?

Lately, our old van and that old farmer have both been coming to mind. I have been thinking about what it means to put something into motion, gain momentum and establish something that will become a long-lasting legacy.

I have a few ideas.

It always brings me back to Sweet Home. Poverty is not limited to that one little American town.  All of our hometowns have kids who play without shoes, or three meals a day.  All those kids have dreams of what they would do one day.

A few months ago, the BC Child and Youth Advocacy Society released the 2011 Child Poverty Report Card.  The numbers are intense: 137,000 children live in poverty in BC.  To put this in perspective, that is double the entire population of my hometown.

Like those old radio songs, kids’ poverty has only been vaguely recognized. Like, the farmer in the field, who ploughed but did not plant anything, we have not done everything we could.  Can anyone explain why?

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About Kisa:

Kisa completed her law degree earlier last year and is currently finishing her articling year at a non-profit that focuses on law reform, legal research and outreach. She grew up on Vancouver Island but has lived all over: North America, Southeast Asia and Europe. In this next season of life, she hopes to see creative community and access to justice established in Vancouver.

Image credit: Wanderlust, by Hermés

Upcoming Conferences & Events

 { for women with hearts + brains + hands + feet } 

We want to mobilize and empower women to transform our world. Therefore, every month SheLoves magazine will update our list of upcoming conferences and events for women around the globe. If you have an event or conference you think we should add, please contact us.

2012 Events, Campaigns & Conferences

Free Them: Campaign to Fight Slavery, Feb.

Here ‘s the Free Them 29 Things PDF to download: 29 Things

The Justice Conference: Feb 24+25, Portland, OR

Illuminate: Feb 24+25 (Youth) Victoria, BC, Canada

LifeWomen Conference: May 3-5, Surrey, Canada

Amahoro Gathering: May 21-25, Bujumbura, Burundi

You Will Be Well

On bringing home baby no. four, a little white pill and purpose and joy on the other side.

By Patsy Wilding | Twitter: @groupgrrl

I left the pyschiatrist’s office clutching my newborn, my prescription and this reminder of hope, “You will be well.”

It is true, I am. Ultimately I thank God for my recovery, the details of which were realized by a little white tablet and tools to change my thinking traps.

Tobias Ronnie entered our lives in October 2009.  Like his three siblings before, we spent a few hours getting to know him prior to committing to a name.  His name is a reminder to me that our faith is greater than experience. Tobias means “The Lord is good.”  Though I believed it, I still didn’t know it in my heart at the moment of naming. My outlook was still altered by the 180 degree shift from life as I knew it, to being back in diapers.

 I had struggled throughout my fourth pregnancy with depression. An unexpected pregnancy, compounded by a virtually cold turkey withdrawal from Celexa, sent me under the covers literally and figuratively. In that place I couldn’t see the joy I now know with my little surprise straggler.

I had chuckled many times at news of “unexpected” arrivals, wondering to myself how it could possibly happen. My fall came. Shame accompanied the news of my pending babe. How could I tell people? It was quite obvious we were not planning any more children–our twins were already almost eight!  My M. Ed. graduation was hardly in the shadows of yesterday and I felt I was beginning to find a sense of myself again after years of giving and caring for young ones. I felt all memories of challenges, the chaos, financial strain and struggles of having three under two-and-a-half returning to me, magnified by the fact that my own sister was longing for her first, while I was unable to accept my fourth.

Many days I couldn’t face getting out of bed. When I did begin to share the news, I could not do so without tears.

Adopted as an infant, I knew I could never consider terminating a pregnancy, regardless of the distress that accompanied it. I am sure my own birth mother knew the same feelings to some degree, though she faced the situation alone. Although I didn’t want the pregnancy my own life and faith trapped me.  So time passed.

As the pregnancy progressed, little change in my outlook was apparent and eventually my doctor referred me to the Reproductive Mental Health Clinic at BC Women’s Hospital. Although I wasn’t seen until after Toby’s birth, I did receive the help I needed. My psychiatrist told me I should never have come off the anti-depressant to begin with and likened it to taking a person with high blood pressure off medication to keep their pressure down.

Relief flooded over me walking out of the doctor’s office that day. I fully believed her that I would be well and I finally accepted it wasn’t something I could overcome on my own. Looking back I realize now that even my own thinking that I might be able to come off the meds for the pregnancy was skewed by not really understanding my depression. Depression, post-partum or other is not an imagined illness. It is real in symptoms and treatments. Some might feel that a life on medication is not a final solution or the divine healing they seek. While I can’t pretend to understand how or why it is possible to experience depression inside faith, I look forward to a day when my healing will be complete.  For in this world it is what it is, I am well and my life is once again worth living.

I am thankful for my recovery and over time I have come to see the work ahead of me as to utilize my training to support other mothers as they transition to motherhood. Every mother will not experience the degree of difficulty I did. It is true that Motherhood is an adjustment and the way in which we experience it is as unique as each individual. Along the way there will be shared stories of similarity. If I have privilege of contributing to some of these stories with encouragement, light, hope and an outstretched hand, what more could I ask.

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Editor’s note: Patsy is participating in the Aviva Community Fund competition with an idea called MotherCare, to support mothers and enrich lives after birth. After reading her story, I know I would have loved to participate in a program like this after the shock and joy of my first babe. Please vote for her idea here. –idelette xoxo

About Patsy:

I am a wife, mother, daughter, sister, friend and woman of faith. I am also a helper. My life has been full of rich relationships and gifts, from my parents choosing me at ten weeks, to my husband and four children, including an unexpected late arrival, Toby, just two years old.

For as long as I can remember I have had a desire to help. As a child I thought that this would take shape into a career as a doctor, but as life unfolded my direction changed. Although I am not an MD., as a Counsellor I am a helper for matters of the heart which are equally, if not at times more important than physical health. Over time I have come to see this is a truer match to my desires, passions and gifts and for this I am thankful.

My professional experience as a helper began as an Early Childhood Educator. From there, I returned to school to pursue my education degree, yet even at that time I had counselling on my horizons. After five years of teaching, I knew that my calling was to support students and others as they navigated the transitions of life and as a result I returned to UBC to pursue a Masters of Education in Counselling Psychology. In 2007 I started my first position as a high school counsellor and knew at once I had found my niche; working with individuals to address concerns of the heart. While I am relatively young in my counselling career, I have a wealth of life and helping experience which greatly enhances my practice.

Recent experience with my transition back to mothering an infant, as well as caring for aging in-laws has inspired a desire to help clientele outside the school system. Patsy’s counselling practice was born to accommodate this desire to support families, adolescents & children, mothers, and elders in their navigation of life’s transitions.

Image credit: Vivid Expressions Photography

Making a Drum: Healing and Wisdom from Metis Hands

She was right: Healing came, when I gave it away.

By Kisa MacDonald | Twitter: @kisamac

I forgot they were coming.  I could see them waiting for me at the curb outside, sitting in an old, blue Ford van. Two large dream catchers clashed against each other in the window.

I apologized across the chaotically dressed dashboard, fumbling around for my keys to the little gallery. Dang it.  How could I forget something like this?

Two wrinkly faces smiled back at me.  No need to apologize.  I had come–right on time.  Peace rippled from these smiling strangers as they climbed down and started unpacking supplies.

That was five years ago–the strangers in the old van were respected Métis elders who were hosting a drum-making workshop.  The little gallery was a non-profit, for-artists space I used to spend every waking moment running:  the Muir Gallery, in Courtenay, B.C.

I was there to let them in.  Then I had to go. My life was busy and my to-do list was longer than I wanted it to be. No worries, she said.

I flicked on the lights and flipped open the old tables and chairs. The walls were covered with artists’ work and a brief Métis history.

But you’re not going anywhere, she said.

As she laid out skins, sinews and wood frames, she explained that this was my time to do something I had never done before: make a drum.  My eyes filled up with tears. (I have always admired people who make extra room for that one left-out, not-committed person.)  So, I put away my list and let her teach me.

How could I miss something like this?

Her hands were fascinating to watch: tough, strong enough to pull hard on the sinews at the back. With grandmother finesse, she covered my littler, younger and weaker hands with hers and tugged hard.

“It is meant to heal, she said. You make a drum for someone else, not for yourself.  The person who receives your drum will receive healing. You have to wait to give it to the right person.”

I touched the soft hide, pulled tight and ran my fingers over the edges. I understood the need for healing. My marriage had fallen apart the year before. I wasn’t tough enough to handle my life, alone. She smiled at me.

Near the end of the workshop, she asked me:  have you ever thought about going into law?  I had been looking at the old photographs on the walls, reading the Métis history, remembering how I had once visited Louis Riel’s grave beside the flooding Red River.

The question surprised me. I had always thought about going to law school, but hadn’t written the entrance exam or filled out applications. My life was wrapped up in that little gallery, sitting quietly on the edge of the high-flowing Puntledge River.

Not sure, I said.

Her laugh came as an honest, gentle rebuke. She climbed back up, into the old, blue Ford with all her unused supplies. I began looking for the keys to lock up.

You will get in.  You will open the path for our kids.

That seems like a good dream.  I did not know what else to say. I locked the door of the gallery and watched the sun set behind the river.

I did get in. The law school published two of my papers on the kinship rights of Aboriginal and Métis families. And, she was right about my drum.

Healing came, when I gave it away.

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Links:

Appeal Review of Current Law and Law Reform:

http://journals.uvic.ca/index.php/appeal/issue/view/330

http://journals.uvic.ca/index.php/appeal/issue/view/361

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About Kisa:

Kisa completed her law degree earlier this year and is currently finishing her articling year at a non-profit that focuses on law reform, legal research and outreach.  She grew up on Vancouver Island but has lived all over: North America, Southeast Asia and Europe.  In this next season of life, she hopes to see creative community and access to justice established in Vancouver.

The Inspiration of Young Leaders

“I think the secret of leadership is to believe in and enjoy the people you lead.” What do you think? Please write me your leadership tips & advice below!

By Winnie Lui | Twitter: @INTELsashimi

“My name is Sarah and my favourite superhero is Batman.”

She spoke steadily into the camera, then glanced sideways at me for affirmation.

I was at the training grounds for young leaders last weekend. The BC Children’s Hospital Foundation lauched Operation Superhero last year, a three-year campaign to raise $5 million for the construction of an Oncology Inpatient Unit at the new hospital site, and they are involving youth aged 8 to 22 to help in the mission.

These Young Superheros serve as fundraisers and spokepersons for the hospital’s campaign, and in the process, become leaders among their peers and in their community.

But first they need superhero training.

The orientation last weekend encouraged and inspired these future leaders, teaching them practical skills like how to be confident, how to strategize their donation proposals and how to handle rejection. These are important social skills that will last them a lifetime.

It’s inspiring to see young people rising up as leaders. Meeting teenagers, hoodie-d and with oversized earphones hugging their jaws, or young ladies with dyed hair and fashionable make-up, I wasn’t quite expecting their calm confidence in talking about why they want to volunteer for BC Children’s Hosptial and what they expect to achieve.

Meeting these young volunteers prompted me to reflect on my own experience in stepping out, and to think about the question, “What is leadership?”

In some ways, I have gone through a similar journey as the Young Superheros: being a newbie, doing something I’ve never done before and running on the fumes of guts and venture–taking that leap of faith.

I did it when I started leading youth groups. The fun part about working with teenagers is that every meeting is an adventure. Akin to canoeing or hiking in the woods, the path taken at a youth meeting is rarely exactly as you planned, and at any given moment, you may need to adjust and take a different path, depending on what the situation dictates.

From my experience with youth groups, I see leadership this way: leadership is relating to those you lead, understanding them and feeling with them; sharing the mistakes and lessons learned in your own journey; doing your best to live out what you believe to be the best way of doing things; and letting your followers see, discover and decide their own path to go.

I think the secret of leadership is to believe in and enjoy the people you lead. People love to follow and work with someone who believes in them. That belief, in turn, raises and expands the followers’ capabilities, making the followers grow, and thus increasing the fruits of the leader’s leadership.

I once studied the insights of Andy Stanley, senior pastor to three churches and founder of North Point Ministries. In his book, Next Generation Leader, he describes leadership in very practical and applicable terms:

1. Focus on doing the things you’re good at doing. Don’t try to do everything; instead, delegate the stuff you hate doing and suck at doing. Do your best to invest as much time as possible doing the things that no one else can do as well as you can. Make your team members also focus on their specialties. This spells efficiency for any team.
2. Be the first to do something that needs to be done. Have the courage to take iniative, to step out before the crowd. Also have the courage to say no to opportunities that do not align with your priorities, and the courage to face the current reality.
3. Be clear. “Clarity is perceived as leadership.” Communicate clearly the goals and objectives. Be honest when the answer is unknown. In the midst of uncertainty, set a clear vision for the team.

Stanley’s insights are, of course, brilliant and the lessons gleaned from years of leadership experience. If I were to make my humble to-remember list for young leaders, here’s what I would write:

1. Leverage the strengths of your followers. You may be smarter than your followers in some ways, but they are smarter than you in other ways. Assign tasks and give junior leadership opportunities to your followers that both suit and challenge them. This way, you avoid being overwhelmed with work, and you begin doing what all leaders should do: grow new leaders.
2. Spend time listening to your followers. Leadership begins with understanding the context of your followers and building trust and connection.
3. Have co-leaders. Leadership is not a one-man task. At the very least, it’s helpful to have someone answer the door during the group activity or check on the cookies in the oven. Yet much more than that, co-leaders are an essential support and a valuable second point-of-view when debriefing, and discussing and planning the next steps.

Now it’s your turn. What have you learned in your life experience about leadership that you would like to share with future leaders? What key tips and strategies have worked for you? What have you seen other leaders do that you would love to emulate? I’d love it if you would write me some of your leadership pointers in the comments below!

About Winnie:

The wave of Asian immigration in the 1990s brought Winnie to Canada on a little red-mast junk. To fulfill her family’s dream of running a business in Hong Kong and giving the children a Western education, Winnie’s father commuted home to Canada during Christmas and Chinese New Year, and Winnie herself spent her childhood between the two continents and among many different schools and neighbourhoods. Her growing up experience has become a mosaic of cultures, languages, and perspectives. Winnie blogs at intellectualsashimi.com and tweets @intelSASHIMI

Photo credit: georgeparrilla, Esther Weng

Clothes on Wheels: Making a Connection in the Community

Sanja Poitras and Clothes on Wheels connect those who have with those who need.
By Christiana Walter

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A young immigrant boy from Burma was arriving at his school in Surrey every day wearing shorts and sandals–in the dead of the Canadian winter. “This is a real problem for refugee families in the community,” says Sanja Poitras, Executive Director of Clothes on Wheels. “They come here with nothing and don’t have clothes suited to our climate.”

The school’s principle stepped in and reached out to Sanja to get the boy, among other things, a pair of shoes.

“He didn’t know how to tie the laces,” Sanja says. He’d never had any lace shoes, so Sanja helped him put on his shoes and watched him beam from ear to ear. “He was so happy. His face was transformed.”

Sanja Poitras, Executive Director of Clothes on Wheels.

Sanja and her husband, Marc, are all too familiar with moments like these. Through their non-profit, Clothes on Wheels, they have the opportunity to give shoes, coats and basic items of clothing to refugee families, immigrants, single moms, single dads and the regular family-next-door struggling to stretch their paycheques. Clothes on Wheels sets up a free, mobile shop in school gymnasiums for high-risk neighbourhoods in Surrey. A flyer is sent home with each child a week before the event and the Poitras are often flooded with calls about people in need.  According to Sanja, this is exactly the point.

She says their goal is to build community, provide support for locals who might not have access to it, and identify specific needs. The Poitras’ and their team of volunteers are intentionally building relationships with people and learning about their unique needs. She and her husband have dropped off meals, provided furniture and even connected abused women and children with local safe-housing programs.

The organization that became Clothes on Wheels was originally a clothing exchange program run out of a portable at Hjoth Elementary School that Sanja came across when she was involved in Relate Church’s work with Surrey schools. The person who asked her to take over said: “I know it’s a lot to ask; don’t feel you have to.”

“I walked in there and it smelled like – well, you know what used clothes stores smell like – and I said ‘Yeah, I think I’m supposed to do this.’”

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“I needed clothes and you clothed me” – Matt. 25:36
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Today Clothes on Wheels partners with the Surrey School District to reach several inner city schools, with 66 schools involved in some way, either through donating or participating. Their volunteers include everyone from high school students filling their community service hours to those who have already been served through the program. For example: Sanja was surprised to see the young boy from Burma show up to help with an event. “I said to him: ‘You don’t need to be doing this,’ and he insisted that he wanted to help. I said, Well, now you’re going to make me cry!’”

Sanja adds: “You give people a little help and they want to give back when they have the chance.”

Clothes on Wheels plan to expand their services to locating job opportunities and helping people get back on their feet. “We don’t want this to be a hand-out,” she says. “We want to alleviate poverty and help give people dignity.”

Plans to expand Clothes on Wheels to schools in the Downtown Eastside are also in the works.

The same week I spoke to Sanja, I read an impassioned open letter to the City of Vancouver from a Downtown Eastside elementary school teacher on behalf of her high-needs students. The letter featured heavily in the news and resulted in an outpouring of support and donations from the city’s residents. Sanja mentioned this letter when I spoke with her and the impression both of these women left me with was their care and passion for the kids outside their backyard and the vulnerable people they share this little corner of the world with. Perhaps, also their belief in the power of community to help and heal.

“My favourite part of doing this is the chance to be a conduit between those with needs and those who want to help,” says Sanja. “Almost everybody has clothes they’d like to give away. We just help connect them with people who really need them.”

Simply put, Sanja says: “Clothes are a way to connect.”

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About Christi:
Christi has a Communications degree from Trinity Western University. She loves stories and feels privileged to have heard some truly incredible ones while interning at Childcare Canada. Christi hopes to figure out how she can best use her gifts to impact the world around her. Her greatest passions are writing and travel. She’s just come back from recent travels in Australia.

Photo credits: Christi, by Cecilia Flaming

MaryAnne Connor: The Woman Behind the NightShift Story

Thanks to a Vancouver snowstorm, this tenacious woman unlocked her doors and said yes to serving and loving Surrey’s homeless.

By Christi Walter

MaryAnne Connor, or “Mac” to pretty much everyone, is a blonde bombshell with a warm heart, a passion for people and a dogged sense of purpose for her life. She’s a former self-made business woman who gave it up all up to give homeless and struggling people in Whalley friendship and a solid meal every day. She’s never looked back.

It all started with one fated snowstorm. In January 2004, Mac was a Vancouver-based business-owner who came to Surrey once a week to attend church. At the time, she was volunteering at a Granville-based street ministry called Lifeline Outreach. “I was doing marketing (for them) because that was my gift, so I helped with fundraising initiatives, but I didn’t get my hands dirty,” she says. “To be honest with you, if I had to drive through this area, I’d make sure my doors were locked.”

Keys

But the news was reporting a terrible incoming snowstorm and, concerned about people on the streets, Mac asked the pastor of a Whalley-based church whether someone should keep the church open overnight as a shelter. “He proceeded to drop the keys into my hand and said he would agree to have the doors open, provided I was responsible.”

Mac felt more than a little overwhelmed. “I just thought it was a good idea–someone should do something–but not me,” she said. “So, all of a sudden I had his keys and I couldn’t say no. How could I?”

“I just started calling everyone I knew, ” she said, telling them: “I need blankets, I need food, I’m opening up the church tonight and I need help!” MaryAnne and a handful of others took the nightshift all week to keep people from sleeping in snow-drifts. She remembers: “About the second night the Lord really broke my heart, because I realized the people I was meeting, were people just like you and me.”

Caring for the One

A few of the other volunteers kicked a girl out for shooting heroin in the bathroom. Concerned the girl would freeze to death, Mac brought her back in and rubbed her hands and feet to warm them. The next day, that same girl gathered up cleaning supplies and cleaned the bathroom she had shot up in.

“She cleaned that place top to bottom and hung up a cheap little shower curtain,” Mac recalls. “Just girly’d it up.” The girl is in recovery today. “She’s like a daughter to me,” Mac adds.

Open Door

The following Monday, Mac was supposed to fly to Las Vegas and present at a business conference, but she found herself torn between her high-powered job and a deep calling she now felt to help her friends in Whalley. She says: “I felt God had kind of opened the door and said, ‘Now what do you think of this?”

Mac Connor chose to walk through that door, promptly cancelling her trip, quitting her job and founding Nightshift Ministries, named after her all-nighters with the homeless.

Nightshift now feeds 100 to 500 homeless and struggling people in downtown Whalley daily. Volunteers serve meals, hand out clothing and shoot the breeze with struggling community members, 365 days a year. Mac felt strongly led by God to keep the organization non-denominational, and, true to her vision, she now has teams from several different churches helping out on a weekly basis.

Dreams

But Nightshift wants to do more than simply meet basic needs and build relationships with hurting people. The organization currently offers referrals to rehab programs, and Mac plans to open a counselling centre and provide medical services. She also dreams of building supported-housing facilities to help re-integrate people into society. “People on the street right now, whether they’re just poor and have a roof over their head but don’t make enough money to exist or feed themselves, or whether they’re absolutely homeless, didn’t get there overnight,” she says.

In the beginning, not everyone in the community shared her passion for the down-and-out people of Surrey. Shop owners in the area have complained about the large numbers of homeless hurting their business. As a former business owner herself, Mac understands their concerns, but she believes: “We should be working together to do something.”

Two worlds

When Nightshift was just a small pack of volunteers serving food out of a church, Mac remembers seeing the Scotiabank tower across the street and a crack-shack close by. “I would stand there at night looking at the corporate world, and watching all these people going into the crack-shack,” she says. “I remember thinking ‘God, something needs to be done. Where is all the money, where are all the hands, where are the people who can fix this?’”

But change is happening. Mac says the business community has come alongside the organization in a powerful way. “They are now helping almost as much as the church community,” she says, “which is pretty amazing.”

I remember when I first heard Mac Connor speak at a local church service about investing her life in the kind of people who would make most of us uncomfortable … People like drug addicts and homeless men and women. I will never forget her words to describe her time spent with friends in Whalley. She said: “I’ve met Jesus there.”

To learn more about Nightshift Ministries and how you can help, go to www.nightshiftministries.org ( They also have a breathtaking blog!)

About Christi:
Christi has a Communications degree from Trinity Western University. She loves stories and feels privileged to have heard some truly incredible ones while interning at Childcare Canada. Christi hopes to figure out how she can best use her gifts to impact the world around her. Her greatest passions are writing and travel. She’s just come back from recent travels in Australia.

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Photo credits: Christi, by Cecilia Flaming

My 20-Something Life: Knowing My True Identity in a Time of Transition

Bye-bye, Dawson Creek. Hello, new adventures!

By Natasha Files | Twitter: @natashafiles

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It feels like yesterday that I packed my things, hopped on an over-priced flight and moved to Dawson Creek, BC. Somehow the time has flown by and amongst my whining about -40° weather and small town drama, I have grown and transitioned into someone who feels ready to embrace my next season of adventures.

This week I am relocating to a new province and city, with a new job, school and program and no expectations, except to excel in school. Anything can happen! Instead of fear, I feel anticipation for the many crazy moments that are to come. I was blessed to land a job as house mother for nine teenage ballerinas (aged 12-18), so I am expecting surprises–as well as excitement about discovering who I am amongst the layers of transition.

The word to define my current emotional state is: “complete.” Amongst the rawness of saying goodbye to a town I love and the eagerness of moments to come, I am resting in the present rather than trying to jump ahead. My last day of work was emotional as I wished clients and colleagues well, then packed up my office. But as I organized my files, I was reminded of the many lessons I have learned over the past few months.

Most importantly, I have learned to mindfully engage with the moment in which I find myself: no matter how uncomfortable or emotionally overwhelming. I have learned to acknowledge my state and respond accordingly. As a girl who historically has taken some drastic measures to avoid emotions, I am pretty stoked to be walking (and loving) this middle path.

My first Masters level class starts in less than a week and I have already received assignments and been asked to read the whole textbook. Eeek! I have never been the girl who loves doing assigned readings and this time is no different (I have had to bribe myself just to make it past page three). That said, the first four pages of my social policy textbook are filled with gems of information.

Identity

The first chapter emphasizes that our identity does not come from age, race, culture, language, economic and job status, sex, religion, citizen/immigrant status or health. I was very impressed to read a Canadian social policy textbook that made such a bold statement about identity. I know in my heart that my identity is more than the above list, but I often find myself striving to accomplish another goal before fully loving who I am or where I am. It comes back to embracing the present moment and accepting myself exactly where I am, without pulling in identifying stereotypes.

These past few months of northern seclusion have helped solidify the relationship I have with myself, but now I want to allow that insight to be communicated consistently. Yes, I am moving to a new city and can easily be identified by my job, schooling, religion and economic status, but I am choosing to break the confines of that comfortable box and challenge myself (and others) to notice me for who I am when all of those factors are stripped away. For example:

• What is my character and how do I present when no one else is around?
• What makes my heart beat and what kind of friend am I?
• What am I passionate about and how far am I willing to go in order to accomplish my dreams?

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So, my SheLoves sisters, I am curious to know:

1)   What have you learned from your current season?

2)   Where does your identity come from?

3)   (This last question is a bit of a selfish one): What advice would you give to someone who is about to become a “mother” to a handful of teenage girls?

About Natasha:
Natasha Files is Case Manager with a Mental Health and Addictions Team. She has experience working with youth and adults struggling with a variety of life-controlling issues and she specializes in eating disorders. Natasha’s passion for mental wellness began when she personally experienced the impact of a genuinely caring professional. That passion is paired with a love of espresso, only to be overshadowed by her desire to see women set free from life-controlling issues.

Becoming a Woman Who Does the Necessary Things

On Delivering 330 Cans of Baby Formula to the Food Bank

By Brandi-Lee Doucette | Twitter: @brandilee1

Let us be women who leap to do the necessary things.

The Backstory: On September 21, 2009 my husband and I welcomed our beautiful little son, Finn, into the world. I will not soon forget the tremendous effort–the pain–that came in constant waves for hours upon hours. The pushing … Oh Lord, the pushing.

“How long will the pushing take?” I asked my midwife (near the start of labour, when I could still speak for more than five seconds at a time.)

“Oh, on average about one to two hours tops,” she replied.

I could manage that, I thought. When the time came, and she told me to push, I did. I pushed. And pushed. And pushed. I pushed for four hours.

Finally he was here. I looked down at him, this little human that came from me, the very one I had the immense blessing of carrying for months. I felt like my heart was going to come spilling out of my eyes; I felt so full of love.

I felt like I finally “got: what moms talked about- that connection and love for a being created inside me. Our desire for this little one was to protect him, surround him with as much love as we are able to give him, and to help him grow to be healthy, happy and strong.

Hello, Formula

I breastfed Finn for the first seven and half months of his life; then, suddenly he decided he wasn’t into it anymore. I don’t know if it was me or him, but it just wasn’t happening. So we had to start buying baby formula to keep him nourished–to help him grow and be healthy. When I approached the menacing aisle of baby food and formula, I was shocked. One can for $27? And it lasts HOW LONG? A week at best? How could we afford this?

As the days wore on and I was buying about a can per week (sometimes more), I began to think: if this is a stretch for my family … an average middle class family of three, what’s it like for the ones who can barely make ends meet? The single mothers? The unemployed mothers and fathers? The parents who want to provide for their kids just as much as I do, but struggle so hard to do so?

The Idea

I brought an idea to a couple of the leaders in our church to put together a Baby Formula Drive to help families that are not able to fully provide for their babies on their own. As we looked into it with the Surrey Food Bank, we learned parents were watering down their baby’s bottles to make the formula stretch. As a result, babies were underweight, prone to sickness, and generally malnourished. We also learned the Food Bank is in a constant need of formula, and in equal and constant shortage. All the time.

So, at our last LifeWomen conference we asked each registrant to donate $5, and all proceeds would go toward purchasing formula for the Surrey Food Bank. The response was overwhelming. The final total was somewhere around $4,600! After some research, we were able to purchase over 330 cans of formula.

Judith Laurel Photography

A few weeks ago we delivered the formula to the Surrey Food Bank. As the van containing the tins backed up and unloaded box after box after box, my heart was again full. Each can represented food for one week for one baby in our community. The near-empty shelves would be more full for a little while.

Part of our SheLoves manifesto is:

Let us be women who carry each other… Let us be women who leap to do the difficult things, the unexpected things and the necessary things.

Loretta Hibbs, community care pastor at Relate Church, with one of the Surrey Food Bank volunteers. Image, Judith Laurel Photography

I believe carrying each other includes carrying those we may never meet. We will probably never come face to face with the families that will benefit from this, and they might never know that some women organized a formula drive for them and their babies.

There are many needs in our world today. Providing for a baby’s daily nutrition? I’ve learned it’s a necessary thing.

About Brandi-Lee:

Heyo! My name is Brandi-Lee Doucette. I am wife to Chris, mother to Finn, and a graphic designer for Relate Church and my independent business, Sparrow Design.

Likes: laughing, low brow humour, a good book, good design, truth, history, breakfast for dinner, and running (just discovered). Dislikes: bad fonts and really spicy food! I believe that a life can be changed, no matter how or where it was started. I was born, raised and currently reside in beautiful British Columbia, right in the heart of the 604.

Image credit: Foodbank Delivery, by Judith Laurel Photography